This is the first week of the baseball season, so we're trying to stay as optimistic as possible. You know us, all smiles and Slurpees. But, for the record, we aren't the ones who rained concrete down upon Angels fans on opening day.
That was just an accident, a random act of God, God apparently having bet on the Red Sox this season.
Mercifully, no one was injured Monday when a chunk of the ballpark came loose and fell some 20 feet, landing near fans who probably thought they were experiencing an aftershock from that opening day when Mo Vaughn fell into the dugout.
So, since the team's otherwise sunny 3-0 victory over Oakland did feature one negative aspect, we can discuss another today.
Some of you Angels fans — and don't take this the wrong way — are insane.
We're talking to those of you who insist (in e-mails and text messages) the franchise would be better off if Arte Moreno sold it. Not to be disrespectful, but even the Rally Monkey thinks your opinion is below that of a primate.
How can anyone around here be anti-Arte? The guy pays for players and charges you less for beer.
Under Moreno's ownership, the Angels routinely have played in front of 40,000-plus fans, made the postseason and participated as big boys in the winter. Only five owners have committed to pay more for talent this season than Moreno has.
Now comes the even more ridiculous part, the explanation many fans give for disliking the guy. It goes back to the name change. People, some of you move forward at roughly the speed of Catholicism.
If you work for or represent the city of Anaheim, yes, you should hold the name change against Moreno. Go right ahead, send him e-mails infected with hideous, virus-wielding worms.
Otherwise, why does this matter? Los Angeles? Anaheim?
Moreno could call his team the Fullerton
Fannies for all we care.
As fans, the names that count are ones like Vlady, Lackey and Figgy. The name that doesn't impact the team's on-field performance is "Los Angeles."
There is a theory among this unstable minority that when Moreno moved "Anaheim" from the front to the back of his franchise's name he cast a spell on the Angels.
These are the same people who believe the Cubs never win the World Series because of a goat. And whatever happened to that whole "Curse of the Bambino" thing? Don't hear much about that anymore.
What makes this name-changing angst even more humorous is the history of the team involved.
We're talking about the Sean Combs of baseball franchises. The Angels have gone through their own Puff Daddy to P. Diddy to just plain Diddy evolution through the years. The New York Yankees don't change their underpants as frequently as the Angels change their name.
And please understand something, especially those of you who preach loyalty and tradition. The name Los Angeles Angels is so old-school it dates to the first day of class. You do know that "Los Angeles" was the name this franchise answered to when it was born, right?
On Dec. 6, 1960, baseball awarded an expansion team to Gene Autry. That team would play its first five seasons in L.A. before moving to Anaheim and becoming the "California" Angels.
In 1997, in a move driven by greed, Walt Disney Co. changed the name again, this time to "Anaheim" Angels, hoping to boost the tourism value of the city and, therefore, Disney's theme park interests.
So why did Moreno change back to "Los Angeles"? That was about money, too. And you know what? Who cares? This is a business and, more to the point, this is Moreno's business.
If sticking "Los Angeles" in the name helps him pay for another hitter before the July trading deadline, isn't that what true Angels fans should want?
Other people have complained about the team colors, particularly the abundance of red. Seriously?
Again, we're not dealing with a club that exactly has been color fast during its existence.
The Angels, as currently constructed under go-go manager Mike Scioscia, run almost as much as their colors do.
Remember, not long ago, the Angels famously trotted out decorated in periwinkle.
You're upset by the sheer stupidity of calling a team that doesn't play in Los Angeles "Los Angeles"?
Well, the Dallas Cowboys used to play in Irving, which isn't in Dallas, but they soon will move to Arlington, which also isn't in Dallas.
The Detroit Pistons haven't played in Detroit in years, and the Phoenix Coyotes bolted Phoenix after the 2003 season and haven't returned since.
There's also the matter of the New York Giants and New York Jets, two NFL teams that don't play in the city of New York or even the state of New York.
So stop calling for Moreno to step aside and stop recalling the glory days of the Anaheim Angels. If you're not careful, you might get what you want.
And the cash isn't always greener on the other side.